good and bad

Life now for me is utterly boring.. I had been sleeping eating and still sleeping and eating. Everyday i will wake up at noon (although I am awake by 9, i will voluntary let my body continuing lying on my bed till it’s time). Then i will have my lunch and read my newspapers while watching TV. I will feel bored after that and will take doing my routine exercise. Sometimes i cant be bothered, then i will continue to lie on my bed playing my iphone or daze blankly at nothing. Around 4-5, sometimes shower, sometimes will go down and do my cycle exercise. By six, dinner should be ready on the table, then dinner time. Watch TV till around 10 or 11. Go to my room and sit in front of the computer and surf or most time watch my downloaded movies. This have been my routines for the past few months. There are only times where my routine will be different, on weekends, docs’ appointment or visit my grandma.

Well, the only day i enjoyed most is when i went for my massage. I did the stone therapy, heard it is good for blood circulation. It is just using the hot steaming stone and rub it along the veins. I feel so good after the two hours massage. Before massage, my left knee was still swollen and i know it is because of the blood circulation. During the therapy, she told me my leg is swollen and feel hot, then after that, she ask me to see my knee and it used to be one size bigger and now it is almost the same as my right knee. I was so surprised and amazed. By just during the 2 hrs, it completely swelled down. i tried using the ice packs for months and it didn’t helped much. she also told me my blood was blocked around my ankle, that’s why when i walked, it always felt painful and she also said it was swollen there. she also advised i should go again.. i will… ehhe

then last few days went for my physio session and it is review time (means doctor checkup). I think i met with all the doctors in physio and he is the best. the last few doctors i met, when i tell them about my problems,i.e. where hurts and i cant bend further, they just disregard me and say.. just continue exercise. they also keep saying ‘ by this time after your surgery, you should be fine, should be able to run’. but they should know not everyone’s healing process is the same. they keep saying as if i dont know my progress. who dont want to heal faster.. i already told them i can’t continue further, they din’t do anything, just say keep exercising. there was once i was unable to completely straighten my leg, because i just come back from KK and my legs hurt. they just say…your operation was months ago, you should be able to straighten and bend your leg completely…. stupid… feel like hitting them.

the new one i consult, at least he listened. then he wanted me to try to push my leg further back. so he pressed on my bended knee and i have to pull my lower legs towards me. I really hurts even without me pulling. then by the third try, i pulled and i can feel the rush (just like when you cracked your fingers). it really hurt , cant even move nor straighten my leg, but i know i need to straighten to make it feel better.after that, really feel better. then he gave me a different set of exercise..and he said my hamstrings are still weak after the operation that’s why it hurts sometimes. Now it still hurts,but i just have to do things slower.. how i wish i can recover fully now.. at least now, when i walk, it doesn’t look like i am limping, i can run a bit, but looks a bit weird.

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